Friday, March 14, 2014

The Art of Breaking a Backboard

Last month while I was playing a pickup game, a guy on my team stole the ball from the other team and raced down the court. He is one of the few leapers we play with so we were expecting the customary dunk.

When he got near the basket he cocked the ball back behind his head with both hands and threw it down HARD! He dunks with the same wrath as Russell Westbrook and this time the result was a shattered backboard.

About 20 of us saw this happen. The broken backboard meant that we were done playing for the day which was bad news, but nobody really seemed to mind since they just witnessed such an amazing feat.

I don't understand why there were not more broken backboards in the NBA before the break away rim era. The picture to the right shows David Thompson dunking on a skinny old school rim. Those were a recipe for shattered glass.

I think breaking a backboard is one of the manliest things a guy can do. It's a couple steps above Chuck Norris on the testosterone scale. I'd like to clarify that I don't approve of vandalism or harming other people's property, but if a backboard breaks as a result of a hard dunk and not just from punks hanging on the rim, then you have my respect.

I remember seeing Darryl Dawkins break backboards when I was a kid and that left a huge impression on me. During my teenage years I broke several rims from excessive dunking but I never put a scratch on a backboard despite secretly wanting to do so.

I think once a person breaks a backboard it should be mandatory to list that on their resume regardless of what they do for a job.

"I see you are applying for our human resources manager. Do you have any prior experience?"
"Not really but I did dunk a ball so hard once that it shattered the backboard." "
"When can you start?"